Saturday, April 5, 2008
Going Bananas in my Dreams
I wake up and wonder where I am. No kidding. Reversing the sleeping time, jet lag, and overwhelmed by my dear friends with their welcome homes.
I actually did not hear a firetruck in the drive up in front of the neighbors house for a potential gas leak and thought I was still in Hawaii. I focused on my unfamiliar bedroom windows and wondered where I was. Another time I heard my son come in at his typical 4am and thought I was in my childhood home in Indiana. Later, I was asleep and I said "Jamie?"
I start to reach for the drinkable water faucet instead of the ever so safe water faucet in my own sink. I don't know where anything is in my shop. I forgot I never have a car if I leave last and I am again enjoying my alternative way of getting to work on my recumbent bicycle.
I am amazed at the piles of necessary (?) objects in my house with still no time to "sort."
I am glad to be home and I think I feel like nesting and building my home again. I gotta make some serious changes around here. I want to build little Hawaii complete with lots of banana plants in my back yard even though there will never be bananas. Guess I can always glue some on the plants later!
I guess I am landing now, trying not to recreate old habits. I may ditch my black and brown clothing and may eventually wear clothes that really fit.
I remember Adrienne Rich's poem I wrote early in my blog. "What am I going to do with the rest of my life?"
And as Ian said looking up in the sky at 4 years old and I hurried him to the pre-school bus in a real hustle, "Mom did you see the birds on the line today?" We should all see the world through childhood eyes occasionally.